This day got eventful right from midnight. After having my bath, I check the time and realize it’s already a new day, Friday. Normal people in normal environments would probably thank God for that, but I don’t allow myself get lofty ideas, this is camp and the weekend will not be as celebrated as I would like. I go to my room and I am instantly welcomed with a myriad of sights that I am not mentally prepared for???. Not just sights but smells. For starters, the room is crowded with about fourteen to sixteen bunks. Next, to maximize the space, two consecutive bunks are joined side by side such that one can easily reach unto the adjacent bed. To then make matters worse, there is only one ceiling fan. One !!! One ceiling fan with a very epileptic centrifugal force.
The room is stuffy, need I spell that out ? ??♀️ and the windows are crowded with laundry waiting to dry so ventilation is basically hampered by the aura of damp khakis. The bed next to mine is occupied by someone who sleeps basic and by basic, I may mean naked but of course, we don’t say that word on public platforms such as this. Anyway, in addition to basic sleeping, her legs are also of a gyrating tendency as she sleeps with one leg heading towards Zamfara and the other already in Mexico. ?
Unfortunately, Mexico happens to be my bed. She spends the night kicking me and I all but suffer in silence until I remember that there is a Nigerian girl in me who can return the favor??. I kick her leg back subsequently because who knows what other part of her anatomy she would invest on mine.
Morning comes and I find that my platoon is on duty. I was appointed sanitation. Of all the chores, I happily hustle to mop because the alternatives would be to either pick the gutter or scrub them. ?
At 12 noon, I head over to the clinic and commence serving my fellow corpers. I see a woman with rhinophyma strutting rather obnoxiously, only to discover she is the clinic head. She is as mean as the effect of acne rosacea on her nose. (she doesn’t have acne, I’m just imagining her that way because she looks off. I can’t really place what the “off” thing is)
While seeing patients, my tummy starts to rumble, as it has been doing for the past week and this feeling of dread comes over me. It is already “that time” of the month and I’m not particularly pumped about it given that I’d be doing it dressed white on white… Alas, some things are out of our control. As if this realization wasn’t enough gloom for the day, the egusi I ate to commemorate my exams the day before, decides to exercise itself in my lower gastrointestinal segment.
We are served bread and boiled egg as breakfast (how am I supposed to eat that without pepper), yam porridge as lunch and Eba as dinner. As you can probably guess, my stomach wasn’t up for all that so I voluntarily skip all three meals for the day.
God sent me akara though, By strange means!!!